Monday, February 8, 2010

When Cancer Comes to Call

What do you do when some one you know or yourself is diagnosed with cancer? Just hearing the word stops people in their tracks. Lives are changed in moments when they hear the words...You have cancer.

I am a breast cancer survivor. It has been almost five years since our lives were turned upside down. This past weekend my friends husband found out he has cancer. They have four children ages 9-2.

When people hear about cancer many want to help. Here is what I found most helpful during my year of chemotherapy.

Don't ignore the family or person.
I think people often put up walls of protection when they hear the word cancer. It is scary to watch someone you love go through it. They are fighting for their life and it can be frightening to think that they could lose. Don't give in to the fear!!

It's nice to offer food but really listen to what their family eats. The first thing people want to do is bring food. It's really nice but many times cancer patients are changing the way the eat. Offer to bring meals but ask what they're eating. Most cancer patients don't want meals filled with "fake food". Ask about allergies and be willing to make something that the family will eat. Ask if their children are picky eaters. It isn't a help if the family will need to toss your food!!

Send cards. Don't forget their kids either!! Or spouse!! You don't have to send money...just let them know you care and that you're praying. Try to plan to send a card or email weekly.

Finally- don't forget to pray. However- please don't quote certain scriptures at them...you know the ones about how everything works together for good- because I promise you that's not what they're thinking!!! Also let them be angry. Don't tell them it's wrong or that they don't have enough faith because they're mad!!

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